(no subject)

[rootofnewt]

i'm cold.

and i'm scared.

this is all moving way too fast.

i have to go into dc tomorrow (and some hour that officially Does Not Exist) for this damn surgery.

the meds weren't sufficient.

if anything, it's HARDER to breathe now. :/

so, they get to go in, snatch a piece of my pericardium for biopsy, install a tube/drain... and then let me sit with a drain under my boob for a day or two.

and i'm not too thrilled about being in the hospital for the weekend. for starters, i can't eat hospital food. ever tried to prepare food for a vegetarian with severe food allergies (soy being the big one)? hospitals are notorious for not feeding food allergics properly. hopefully boy will be able to find hummus, pita, apples, cheese, taco bell. you know--essentials.

meanwhile, i will be bored... i'll probably try to see if i can steal the phone line and use my modem (if i can dial out locally without hitting the hospital operator, i'm safe).

i'll take books, but the one i'm reading is big and heavy. it's probably too heavy to hold up when i'm tired and tube-under-my-boob-y.

the staff is all scared to death about my latex allergy. i don't blame them--i avoid my doctor's office because of this. walking into a hospital takes serious courage. and i'm worried that if i do react, they'll give me something i'm allergic to (like benadryl). i know that they have all my records, but will they remember to look if i'm going into anaphylactic shock because the anaesthesiologist didn't do zir homework and gave me an anaesthetic containing and/or derived from soy?

*sigh*

did i mention that i'm scared?

and i can't shower from tomorrow morning until i come home (sunday if i'm lucky).

so i'm gonna be a stinky, itchy, tired, starving mess who's really grumpy because she's wearing her glasses.

and i'll be having flashbacks to when i was eight years old and having my tonsils out and not knowing what the hell was going on because the doctors talked to my mom, not me. now, the doctors talk way too fast for me. i'm on pain meds, i'm short of breath, it's all i can do to look awake and not fall over... i can't exactly think on my feet here.

i'm scared.

Comments

[klwalton.livejournal.com]

(((hugs hugs hugs))) and I'll be sending energy, healing, calming, soothing vibes all day tomorrow.

(((((ygg)))))

[fluzby.livejournal.com]

Have a heavy marking pen and paper? In BIG letters, you or boy need to write down your "worst" allergies like the benadryl, latex, etc. and bring some tape in with you tomorrowand tape up the sign in a conspicuous place.

Nurses are super overworked and stressed out. Help them out a little. =)

I'm so sorry to hear that you have to have this done. I'll keep you in my thoughts tomorrow and this weekend.

[stmaybe.livejournal.com]

(((((hugs)))))

i'll be keeping you in my thoughts tomorrow & this weekend. i'm looking forward to hearing how much better, if exhausted, you feel next week.

ps - our entire university & hospital uses... dial 9 + the phone number you're trying to reach, to make a local or long distance phone call.

[shaktiqueen.livejournal.com]

(((((((((((((MUCH LOVE)))))))))) and many many many healing and safe vibes.

[dahliablue.livejournal.com]

{{{{{many, many hugs and so much love}}}
sweetie, i'm so sorry you have to go through all this. i will certainly be thinking about you tomorrow and this weekend..
oh yes, i agree with writing down your allergies and tape them or pin them like your back in school! you never know what doctors and nurses will remember from patient to patient, so you can help them out that way by making it very clear that those things need to be avoided.

i'm sending many healing vibes your way, along with some for strength..

[sabethea.livejournal.com]

(((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))

i expect i've written this after you've gone into hospital. but i hope even if you can't read this you can feel the healing vibes i'm sending your way...

[needlegrrl]

(hugs) I'll be thinking of you, and vibing. I hope it all goes well, and I'm sorry that you aren't better!!

[floppy-hat.livejournal.com]

*HUGS* Man, that's awful! I'll send some happy healing vibes your way. Hope this does help though! Hospitals can be such scary places!

[ex-imagine-t263.livejournal.com]

*HUGS&HUGS&MOREHUGS*

Best wishes from a stranger

[the-magician.livejournal.com]

I don't think we've ever met, but I got to your page from a friend of mine's (Sandra) and you have my best wishes and prayers that it all goes (has gone) well.

Just heard on the radio yesterday that they tested something like 200 GM free bakery products and found GM soya (at some small level) in nearly 25% of them ... apparantly under UK law, they acknowledge that keeping stuff GM-free is just about impossible, so making a best attempt and keeping the actual level under 1% of the product is legally acceptable ... of course if that little soya is enough to trigger your allergies, then your definition of acceptable will not match theirs!

Good luck, and just think about how much better it will be if it all works out ok!

Chris

{hugs}

[wrdgrrl.livejournal.com]

I hope this procedure helps get you back on the road to recovery. We're here for ya, babe. Hold boy's hand and breathe deep. You'll be just fine.

{mega super ultra hugs}

[jkatj.livejournal.com]

Egads. Of course you're scared. But you're going to come out fine in the end. I'll keep you in my thoughts, girly.

**slurp**

[absinthea.livejournal.com]

{{{hugs}}} You know we'll all be thinking of you and checking in far too often this weekend.
+~+~+healing vibes+~+~+
Oh, yes, and I second the notion of making sure you have a large, prominent sign to list your allergies...especially the worst ones. Make sure that they visually show boy or you that they are also listed in BRIGHT BOLD markings on your chart.
{{{hugs some more}}}

[onceupon.livejournal.com]

*SUPER SLURP!!!!!*

I love you, babe, and so do SO many other people. Keep positive thoughts if you can, and know that we are all sending goodness your way.

I'm sure things are going to go fine -- you deserve it after all this stuff.

Let me know if there's anything I can do for you.

I LOVE YOU!

[ashbet]

(((gentle hugs))) Can I bring you some trashy reading material??

-- Andi, worried!!

love, healing vibes, etc.

[laverick.livejournal.com]

honey, I'm so sorry to hear you have to deal with all this. I really really hope this procedure does some wonderful stuff to ease your discomfort and pain!

I understand your fear but with so many of us sending you love, prayers, calming thoughts, you've GOT to be okay, okay?

Hopefully you can keep some familiar and reassuring pictures and objects around you--and boy!--and this can help you get through the weekend.

I'm thinking of you and praying for the best! (((((hugs))))))))

bracelet?

[laverick.livejournal.com]

Definitely keep your allergies and meds on your person at all times. if you have a bracelet that can contain this info, that'd be great, or have boy type em up on the computer and print out multiple copies for all the docs and nurses.

[baobh.livejournal.com]

*love* *hug* *pet hair*

[sheilamarie.livejournal.com]

You'll get this probably after all is over and done with, but I do want you to know that I'll be thinking of you all weekend long and sending well wishes your way.

*huggles*

good grief

[chorus-of-chaos.livejournal.com]

I'll be adding my well wishes and light a candle for you during my meditations...to heck with a sign, I'd take a permanent marker and write your allergies on your arm and your stomach. If Boy has a chance, you might have him make a brief post in your journal so we all know how you are doing.

{{{hugs}}} Good luck!

[mesmerize77.livejournal.com]

My thoughts will definately be with you, dear. I hope that the surgery goes well, and that everyone is made well aware of your allergies, so that nothing horrible happens. *HUG*