Banana.

Tom has always kept his wallet in his front hip pockets. When wearing tight jeans (usually on-stage), he's taken to just using a makeshift moneyclip for a few bucks and his ID.

Anyhow, I bought him a new pair of jeans today. They're low rise, tight to mid-thigh. They look good on him, but there's no place to stow his wallet,keys, inhaler, etc. Well, he didn't like the idea of a fanny pack. I suggested he carry a hipster man-purse and he said he'd risk losing it. So I suggested the other urban bohemian standby--his accordion case. He found that ludicrous, though I can't imagine why. Then I brought up thrifted ratty tweed jackets with inside pockets and a bifold wallet, instead of his weird flippy trifold favorite. He did contemplate that for awhile, but glared at me when I said it would help complete his new manbrarian persona.

He won't use the back pockets because his butt will be uneven. He could carry two wallets, I suppose. That might work. Butt pontoons.